The Return of Candy
by Tuba (aka Mrscage)
Chapter 1
The night of the
party at the Pony Home (right after the last episode of the anime).
Candy
wakes up in the middle of the night not remembering her dream, she feels only
her cheeks wet from tears, she can’t remember immediately where she is, having
spent her whole life from a house, a city and a family to another. It takes her
a few minutes before she realizes that she is at Pony Home. It’s not the first
time it happens, since she left Terry in New York. She often woke up during the
night in a sweat and not knowing where she was.
She recalls the day that
she passed surrounded by her friends, around the table, talking and laughing.
Even if it was hours ago she feels like it has been years; she doesn’t feel the
same. Suddenly she feels like climbing a tree and throws herself outside,
barefoot and in her nightgown.
The fresh air makes her feel good. She
runs to the hill and climbs the tree in the darkness of the night. She sits on a
branch and stares at the emptiness.
"Here I am on this tree just like
in my childhood, did I make some steps in the way of my life since the first day
when I climbed on this tree? Did I succeed to become the person whom I dreamed to
become one day? Or am I always at the starting point, despite everything that
I’ve been through? It feels like yesterday my first meeting with Eliza and Neil,
I was only a little girl who was dreaming to finally have a family, this is what
I’ve been looking desperately for all my life, a family, and what did life gave
me instead? I was abandoned in the snow in front of the door of an orphanage, I
could have died from the cold but what did I do? I fought against destiny and
cried of with my strengths to make myself hear. And since that day, I never had
the right to be happy without fighting; I always knew that my smiles were going
to be followed by tears... a first love who died a family who never considered
me like one of theirs and Terry... I loved him so much; I loved him as if he was
my saviour, my family, my heart, and everything that I’ve dreamed of day and
night. And what did he do??? NOTHING... He did nothing to find me..... A BIG FAT
NOTHING!! "
She begins to cry as if she was decided to dry her eyes
not to cry all her life anymore. Between the tears she makes a
decision:
"I’m... going to leave..."
Yes she’s going to
leave, since life made fun of her, she’s going to make fun of life.
"But how I can I leave everybody? Annie... my sister, Patty... my
friend, the Pony’ home... my home, Albert... my prince of the hill, Archibald...
my cousin, how can I leave them behind me and what will they do without me?
Which is stupid question, I going to leave them just like Anthony, Alistair and
Terry left me, just like my mother who left me, they’ll handle it just the way I
did. After all no one really cares about how I feel, and then I can’t take it
any more, for once in my life I will be selfish and I’m going to think only
about myself. If I stay with them, I will end up losing my head by hiding my
feelings and taking care of their problems, moreover I will have to see Aunt
Elroy, Eliza and also Neil... My decision is made”
She comes down as
quickly as possible from the tree where she had practically spent the night
crying and thinking. Just before the sun rises she runs to the Pony Home, gets
dress in less than a minute and even without writing a letter for her friends
who had also spent the night over there, she leaves without even looking
back.
It’s been already an hour since she left, she walks without knowing
where she’s going. With every step she asks herself where to go and even is she
can’t find the answer, she feels better without stopping, at least she can be
herself, without trying to hide her feelings. The only place where she could
feel good it’s in Terry’s arms but she can’t see him any more, she doesn’t have
the right to do it....
In New York…
It’s three o’clock in the
morning and as usual Terry is upright thinking about his life and about the one
who was it’s light a few times ago.
"When will this bloody sun rise?
I’ve had enough of the sleepless nights, what if I drink something? A little
glass just to make me sleep. NO. I promised her and I keep my promise, here I am
with a woman I don’t loved and I never will, just to keep my promise. I’m acting
like a perfect gentleman. However I know that what Susannah feels for me is only
obsession and it doesn’t have anything to do with the love. Nobody really loved
me, neither my parents, nor my friends, nobody except her... In college they
were thinking of me as a rebel without any feelings, no one wanted to see what
was in my heart under the crude appearance. No one... except for her… It’s
useless to think about her, I’m going to lose my head completely. I can’t go
look for her, she’s never going to forgive me if I don’t keep my promise and
Susanna will never let to me go. Except if.... If I die... yes well, why not? I
have never been as courageous as Candy and she has move on with her life but
what am I going to become? I can’t live with Susanna and I can’t leave her, she
might kill herself, I couldn’t live with her death it’s going to be like burden
on my back... It’s clear, there is only one solution here, I must get out of
everyone’s life and choose death, and perhaps finally I will find some peace.
Why to die? Why not thinking only of me and my happiness, why care about other
people? I’m not Candy; I can’t let other people’s happiness pass before mine
anymore. I’ve had enough... And I don’t care what you think Candy, I will find
you and do everything I can to get you back, to find the happiness that we
lost... and if you don’t want me... we’ll see then… "
With the
decision he just made, Terry finally sleeps well that night. In the morning he
wakes up singing, he immediately takes his harmonica and begins to play merry
songs. He feels so good that he even goes to say “good morning” to Susanna and
leaves very early to achieve his plan.
Once outside he can’t walk calmly
as he is impatient to find Candy, starts to run, and doesn’t care about the
people looking at him. He goes to the train station and leaves for Chicago,
without informing neither the theatre nor Susanna, since he won’t be coming
back, he doesn’t worry about his work or of his duty towards the girl who had
only brought misfortune in his life, any more. And she could die if she wants to
so much; it’s not Terry’s business anymore.