Dreams Never Fade
by Lady Laura Castillo
In this episode: Susannah was not able to save Terry and the so the lights fell on him instead. Although Terry does not lose his leg, he is paralyzed from the waist down.
Terry laid down in his bed looking through the window. For him it was as if all of his dreams and goals had flown out that window and disappeared. He would say to himself,
“You’re a failure, an idiot, the laughing stock of everyone, as always...”
Terry didn’t know what to do. He didn’t have a place to go or someone to call. And those weren’t his only problems. What was he going to tell Candy when she found out? She was already on her way to New York. She was probably already in the Train Station.
“She’ll surely think I’m just a poor disabled person. She’ll just feel pity for me. Not love. Pity. She’ll only care for me because I’m condemned to that wheel chair. I’m so stupid, why did I sent her a one-way-ticket? Now I have complicated her life. I’m an idiot. I HATE MY SELF! I HATE MY SELF!"
While he spoke to himself, the tearsflowed down his cheeks.
Just then, a nurse came into the room.“Good morning, I came to bring you breakfast. How are you feeling today?”
“I don’t feel a thing,” answered Terry while he dried his tears . When will I be able to get out of here?” Terry asked the nurse.
Terry wanted to get out of the hospital as soon as possible. He wanted to run away and hide. He wanted to disappear.
“Hmm, the doctor wants to perform a few other tests, but I think you’ll be able to go tomorrow. If you’ll excuse me, I have to go.”
The nurse left the room, but before she could close the door, Susannah came into the room.
“Hello Terry, I bring you a letter from everyone back at the Theater. We all miss you very much.”
Susannah handed the letter to Terry, but he just left it on top of the nighttable.
“You’re not going to read it Terry?” Susannah asked.
“Not now.” Terry answered coldly.
Susannah took a chair and sat besides Terry. Then she said, “Terry, I’ve been thinking... It's not that I want to make you sadder, but now you won’t be able to act, and well... What are you going to do? Where are you going?”
“I don’t know Susannah, and right now I don’t want to think about that. I just want to be alone.”
“Terry, why don’t you come with me to my house? I know I can make you happy.”
Terry looked at Susannah coldly.. “You can’t make me happy! Don’t you get it? Are you going to make walk again?”
“Terry, I know I can’t do that. I know I’m not a nurse. But I can give you a lot of... A lot of love.”
Terry was now upset. “What do you mean, ‘I’m not a nurse’? huh?! Besides, you know perfectly well you can’t give me love either. Don’ act so innocent.”
Susannah stood up from the chair. “Terry! How can you say that?”
“Susannah, just go, please.”
“Terry, please, listen to me.”
“Go! Leave me alone!”
Susannah left the room. She closed the door, but remained in front of Terry’s room for a second. “Someday Terry, someday you’ll forget about Candy.”
Susannah started to cry and she left the hospital running.
Meanwhile, in the Train Station, Candy asked how to get to the Theater that Terry worked. After a while, an old man told Candy how to get there. When she arrived at the Theater, she didn’t see anyone there. At the same time, Susannah arrived from the hospital. Candy saw Susannah and approached her.
“Excuse me! I’m looking for Terry, Terry Grandchester. Can you tell me where can I find him?” Candy asked Susannah.
Susannah didn’t know if she should ignore Candy, or just lie.
“Oh Candy... Terry? He’s not here. He’s probably at his apartment.”
“How wierd,” answered Candy. “He told me to look for him here. I might as well go to his apartment. Thank you.”
Susannah walked away. “I’m sorry Candy. Again I’ve lied to you, and I don’t like to, but I really love Terry, and I’m sure that if he forgets you, you’ll be stronger than me."
Candy left the theater and went to Terry’s apartment. When she got there, no one opened the door, and Candy began to worry.
“How weird! Not only Terry is not where he should be, but Susannah... She acted so strange.”
While Candy spoke to herself, one of Terry’s neighbors approached her.
“Looking for Terry?”
“Oh, yes! Can you please tell me where he is?”
“Well, you won’t find him here. He should be at the Theater were he works.”
“But I was there, and they told me he wasn’t there.” Candy was beginning to get more worried.
"If I were you, I would go back.”
“Yes, that’s what I’m going to do.”
Candy left the building and went back to the theater. When she got there, she noticed they were practicing for Romeo and Juliet, and they were doing the balcony scene. But she noticed something strange...“Wasn’t Terry supposed to be Romeo? Something must have happened!
Candy stood there thinking what could have happened to Terry.
Right then, someone touched Candy’s shoulder.
“Excuse me, but you can’t be here.” It was one of the security men.
“Yes I know. I’m sorry. I’m looking for Terry, Terry Grandchester.
Can you please tell me where I can find him?”
The man’s face turned sad and gloomy.
“Terry, huh? Uh, he suffered an accident. I suppose you’ll find him in the hospital that’s... When you walk out of here, turn to your right. He’s in the hospital two blocks down. I forgot it’s name... but it 's the only hospital in the zone, so you’ll find it.”
Candy ran out of the theater to the hospital. When she got there she asked a nurse for Terry. When the nurse told Candy where Terry was, Candy ran up the stairs. People were screaming to her, “Hey, watch it!”.
Candy almost made another nurse fall, but she had to run. She had to see Terry. When she arrived at Terry’s room, she didn’t know if she should go in or just stay there. She felt very nervous. Finally, she decided to go in and she found Terry sleeping. She noticed that he had been crying, for his cheeks were wet. Candy wondered what could have happened to Terry. He didn’t have any bruises. He seemed perfect.
Candy saw Terry’s hand and grabbed it softly. It was the same warm hand that once touched her face when she fainted back at the Royal School Saint Paul in London. Suddenly, she felt his hand moving.
Terry woke up.
“Candy,” Terry said softly.
“Terry, what happened?”
“Candy, I’m so sorry, I wanted to perform my best for you, but... the lights fell, and... now I’m... Candy, you better leave. You have nothing to do here. Not any more.”
“But what are you talking about?!”
“I don’t want you to know. You’ll feel pity for me, only pity. Please go."
Terry pulled his hand away from Candy’s. Candy was now even more worried.
What did Terry mean about the lights falling on him? What was wrong?
“Terry, if you don’t tell me, it won’t matter. I’ll still find out, but I’d rather hear it from you. Tell me.”
“I’m paralyzed!! Ok?! And who wants a paralyzed failure?!”
Candy didn’t know what to say. Terry... paralyzed?
“Terry, medicine has advanced so much. I know you’ll be able to walk again.”
“Candy I would be a problem for you. Just forget about me. Be happy. Go.”
Candy was now upset with Terry’s pessimism. She couldn’t control herself .“Terry, I’m not leaving you! You are wrong! Your problem doesn’t change my feelings toward you! I don’t feel pity for you because I know that if you really want something you’ll get it. I know you’ll walk again if you just make it one of your goals.”
When Candy finished talking, Terry didn’t argue. He didn’t say a word. He just looked at her and smiled. He felt relieved. He surely though Candy was going to leave him.“I’m an idiot Candy. How could I ever thought, that you, were going to leave me.“
Terry grabbed Candy’s hand. “Candy, a few hours ago Susannah came in here and asked me where was I going to go now that I can’t perform. She’s right .I have nowhere to go. I’m not going back to Engla---“
Before Terry could finish talking Candy interrupted him. “Silly you! You’re coming with me to Chicago, and we’ll see if you can be rehabilitated.“
“Candy, thank you.” Terry brought her hand closer to his face and gave it a very sweet kiss. “Take my apartment keys that are in the first drawer of that table. You can spend the night there. I’ll probably be out of here tomorrow, so pack what you consider more important. Then we’ll see when are we going to leave. The sooner the better.”
When he finished talking, the same nurse from the morning came into the room to tell Candy that it was already 7:00 PM and she should leave. Candy left the hospital and while she walked towards Terry’s building she thought how calm Terry behaved, even when she told him that he should return with her to Chicago. He didn’t behave rudely as he usually did. He acted very nice. He must have been very sad to act that way. As Candy drew closer to the building, she noticed that Susannah was standing in front of the building looking at Terry’s window.
Susannah turned around. “Oh Candy, what a coincidence. If you’re looking for Terry, he’s not here.”
”I know that. I know where he is. He gave his key and told me to spend the night here. I don’t know if you know that he was pa---.”
“Yes Candy, I know everything. I suppose you’ll leave tomorrow then.”
Candy noticed Susannah’s attitude wasn’t her best. It was obvious she liked Terry. Candy didn’t know if she should tell Susannah their plans to return to Chicago together. Terry wasn’t going to tell her, she knew that for sure. She also knew it would be rude if they left without telling her. Anyway, Susannah liked Terry, and she would worry to death if she didn’t know where Terry was.
“No, Susannah. I’ll leave when Terry gets out of the hospital. I think you should know he’s coming with me to Chicago to see if he can be rehabilitated there.”
“What? But I offered him to stay with me. He can be rehabilitated here!”
“Susannah, he didn’t tell me that. He told he had nowhere to go.”
Candy didn’t know what else to tell Susannah, so she just said goodbye and went up to Terry’s apartment. Susannah remained outside the building, thinking, “He’s not leaving with you. I won’t let that happen, no!”
© (1999) Laura Castillo