Part 4

Annie rushed to the infirmary to get help. Running as fast as she could, her mind blanked from fear and incomprehension. Her friend, the girl who was still lying in her bed was not the girl she had known all her life. Candy was motionless, barely breathing, her head on her puke filled pillow. She hasn’t been able to get through her best friend despair. Candy was not talking, hadn’t left her room in weeks and now had been in bed for days; pale and unable to hold down the food she tried to force feed her. Patricia and she have been by her bedside every free moment they had. At first, Candy had denied them explanations although they kind of expected Candy to be saddened by Terry’s departure. Sister Grey had even contacted Aunt Elroy who had only sent a mail response to the Mother Superior, explaining that she had nothing to do with the orphan girl adopted by her family. She gave Sister Grey full responsibility to take care of Candy and to keep it as low profile as she could and not to drag the Andrew name in the mud any further.

Archibald and Alistair had been outraged by their aunt’s coldness at their last family meeting when she forbidden the boys to have anymore contacts with Candy, which of course the boys didn’t do. Having seen the state Candy was in when they had last rescued her from another encounter with Neil and his fiends, they had beaten her badly, even broken one of her fingers when she had reached for a stone, trying to defend herself. Archie went through a rage fit after he found her semi conscious murmuring Terry’s name, her face soaked in blood. That was the last time they had heard her voice. Even after her wounds were healed, she had refused to speak to anyone. Listening to their preaching with a blank stare, hearing Annie’s sobs telling her how much she needed her. Dismissing Archie’s violent speech on how much he hated that son of a bitch Grandchester, finding peace in Alistair and Patty’s silence. Yes, silence was peaceful and Candy had found a way to clear her mind and soul and let herself be engulfed by white noise. In her own little world, she had toned out all her senses, nothing was reaching her and it was just fine to be nothing. To feel nothing.

Now, her body had started to protest. Painful cramps, nausea, panic attacks where she could actually feel her heart almost stop. She sometime wished for the Heavens to swallow her whole. She had woken up from a tormented nightmare by her own screams of pain and terror. Eliza’s sneer still dancing behind her eyelids, she had vomited the chicken soup Annie had forced fed her the night before. Her friend had stayed the night she guessed because she was already by her side, her face distorted by shock. She had watch Annie run to get help, sobbing uncontrollably. What could she say to her friends she thought; after all she had nothing to give anymore. “You took everything from me Terry and left me with nothing…”

Sister Margaret had found Annie and Patty both at the chapel, praying fervently she thought. Actually, Annie had fallen asleep, her head resting on the statue of the Virgin Mary. Patricia was stroking her hair gently, saying her rosary. Annie had woken up quickly to the sound of the sister’s voice.

“Girls, she’ll be all right. Must have been what she ate last night. You mustn’t worry like that, you’ll get sick yourselves. Go back to bed; you’ll both be excused from class tomorrow.”

“But Sister Grey said…”

“Don’t worry about Sister Grey, I’m Candy’s primary care giver now; she just doesn’t know what to do anymore.”

Sister Margaret had escorted both of the girls to their rooms. Annie had closed her door and Patty somehow couldn’t take another step.

“Sister Margaret, I’m scared… I’m scared for her but even if she doesn’t say a word, I know my friend is still there. She stood up for me so many times, I used to feel like she feels now when I was alone and ignored by my family and made fun by other classmates. But she’s not alone, where all here for her and yet… I prayed God tonight to understand her but I feel so helpless. Annie cries, Archie yells and my… I mean Alistair stays silent but he’s brooding so much, his grades have been going down and…”

“Calm down Patty… Calm down. There’s nothing we can do but pray my child. You did your part tonight now go and rest, making yourself sick with worry won’t help Candy in any ways. Go on and do as I say.”

“ I may be young Sister Margaret but I can just imagine what Candy had to go through knowing that Terry was expelled because of her. If Alistair would leave me leave like that… They had gotten so close last summer…”

Patty had regretted her last sentence as soon had she had said it. Getting Candy in more trouble was not her intention. She had left a pensive Sister Margaret behind her door and went to bed but didn’t sleep at all.

Sister Margaret returned to Candy’s bed side in the infirmary. She took her hand in hers; she always had a soft spot for the rebel child that Candy was. She had changed the cold cloth on her forehead and prayed for a while till Candy had opened her eyes and looked at her. She had a lost look in her eyes and it broke the sister’s heart. Young girl in love, she thought. A feeling she had long buried into her own heart. A lost love that had led her to the convent. Maybe she could understand what the young lady was going through or maybe not. She had to try.

Candy licked her chapped lips and she had help her sit and taken a glass of water to her mouth. She had taken a few sips but the clear liquid seemed to burn when she swallowed. Could being in love hurt that much?

“Do you feel better Candy?”

Of course silence was her only response.

“I think, I think I know what is troubling you my dear and I think it would be better if we talked about it, I mean if you need to. Don’t be fooled by my religious clothing my child, I was once a girl like you. Young and vulnerable and… in love…”

Candy’s eyes widened. There was no way she was having that conversation with the sister. She feigned going back to sleep.

“I have notified M. George Johnson of your condition. I received an answer that he would come and visit you in the next few days. He’s the one that brought you here in January. He seemed very much concerned and asked that I stayed with you until he arrives. I had to explain what had happened but he didn’t say a word. Will you talk to him when he gets here?”

Candy reopened her eyes but didn’t look at the sister. George, what would he think of her, what would he say to the great uncle William? She didn’t feel strong enough to protest or do anything for the matter. He would probably take her back to America. America!!! Maybe he could take her back and then she could find Terry… She didn’t know if the news was good or bad as another flush of nausea shook her. But she had nothing to throw up anymore.

“Candy…I’m going to ask you a very personal question but I want you to understand that I only want to help you and that the information will stay between me and you… Candy, have you bled this last month?”

Candy held back a sob that tore her heart out. Her body went stiff and she started shaking. No she hadn’t bled but what did it mean? Why would Sister Margaret ask such a question? Why did it feel like she knew the answer anyway? Why did Candy feel like she was the filthiest thing on God’s earth? And why did Terry leave her like this?

After a day of rest and a visit from an old but nice doctor, she was finally out of bed and back into her room. She prepared her baggage and cleaned up her room. George was to come and take her away from school in the evening. Sister Margaret had arranged everything she had said. She would meet with her friends and her cousins after dinner and then would go to Sister Grey’s office and leave. To where and why she didn’t know. She was just a child Sister Grey had said with much disgust in her voice. She told her she would pray for her to find God’s way. Whatever that meant. All she knew is that she had lost her way. Sister Margaret had spoken of the miracle of life, of bringing God’s child into the world. God was supposed to be everywhere but why did she feel so abandoned?

The smile on her friends and cousins faces told her that she probably looked better. They seemed genuinely content by her appearance. She would have to trust them because she didn’t dare look into a mirror, not sure if she would recognize herself or liked what she saw. She said reassuring words to them and hugged them goodbye. Then George had arrived and they went to Sister Grey’s office where to her surprise, Terry’s father was there. She almost panicked and wanted to run away but Sister Margaret was there to support her. She held her head down, feeling the disapproving looks her way. George had cut the meeting short when the Duke started to shout profanities at the Andrew name, saying that he thought William Andrew had lost his mind adopting trash for an heir. George had slammed the door making Sister Margaret winced, pulling Candy into an embrace, soothing her with the Lord’s blessings. The trip to the Andrew’s suite at the Savoy was silent. George was not a man of many words but he had gently pat Candy’s gloved hand in the car, trying in his own way to say that she was safe with him.

She had found her appetite again and had blushed every time she had asked George if she could order from the hotel kitchen for a snack. She was treated as a princess and George could never say no to her. She had receive a letter from the great uncle William announcing that they would finally meet in New York. They packed and made their way to Southampton to embark on the Mauritania again. She would hang out where she had first met Terry, lost in her memories. She had come to England heartbroken and left heartbroken as well. For the first time she had reached and stroked her belly; talking silently to this little ball of flesh inside her. She was 15, pregnant, unwed with nowhere to go that would fit. For the first time in her life, she connected with her mother and she was scared as hell.

Another royal suite in a most luxuriant hotel in New York. Candy thought she would get tired quickly of all this rich fluff; longing for the clean airs and green hills of Pony’s. Three weeks had past and finally, she was told that uncle William would join them for dinner. To her surprise, Albert showed up, arm in a sling; saying he was in a train accident in Italy. It took her a few hours to collect her thoughts about the whole uncle William being Albert, it didn’t make sense even after two cups of vanilla ice cream and three bananas. She had been adopted into a weird family but didn’t mind really. Albert was here and he didn’t scream at her. But he didn’t hold her in his arms like he used to, maybe he felt awkward towards her now that she was a “woman”. Even though she needed to be held, Terry would hold her no matter what, wouldn’t he?

“Why the sad look little one?”

“Oh it’s nothing Albert… It’s nice that you call me little one again. I’m so sorry to disappoint you Albert; you’ve done so much for me…”

“Stop that nonsense. I knew what I got myself into when I adopted you. Bright, courageous, brave and a big heart. Although, I’m a little surprised about your… condition, I am here for you. You don’t need to worry about your safety. The child will be taking care of by good reliable parents. I’ll make sure of it myself.”

Candy’s heart stopped.

“What did you say?”

“I said the child will have good parents, I’ll make sure of it.”

“NO!”

She slammed the door of her bedroom. She needed to get away. Pony’s home, Miss Pony, Sister Lane, they’ll know what to do. They’ll take care of her; she’ll keep the baby and raise him in Pony’s home. Yes, that was her only option. “Oh! Terry, they want to take our baby…”

She heard some loud talking or was it shouting? George and Albert were having an argument over her she guessed. Poor George, will he have the task of making her bend to Albert’s rules? They lowered their voices and after a few minutes, she heard a soft knocking at her door. Albert got into her room and sat on her bed. She was standing up by her window.

“I’m sorry, if I upset you, I didn’t mean to. I thought it was best. I’m sorry I didn’t listen to your side of the story.”

“I love him and I’ll raise this child, on my own if I have to. Feel free to disown me; I won’t use the Andrew name anymore. Never brought me much luck anyway. I’ll go back to Pony’s home, where I’m accepted as I am. It was nice to see you again Albert, I’ll leave in the morning. I won’t bother you again.”

“Did I say that? Don’t go all melodramatic, I know you can take care of this child but you’re still a child yourself. I thought it was the right thing to do but I guess not. I’m sorry you thought I would force you to give up the child, I won’t. And you’re still very much an Andrew and have every right to the name and the wealth it brings to you…”

“I don’t care about wealth, I…”

“Listen to me! You’re entitled to your share, you will not need of anything and I’ll make sure of that. Choose anyplace you want to raise that child and you’ll be provided for. Just tell me what you need…”

“I need him…”

“Well, you can thank George because he’s got private investigators working around the clock to find your beau, little one. We just
don’t know where to start really. If he left England, it was anonymously, he could be anywhere.”

Candy thought of Terry’s connection to New York, to his mother but she swore to the secret. Sill, in his note, Terry said he wanted to come to America, he loved the theater; his mother was a renowned actress on Broadway, didn’t need a private investigator to make the connection.

“He left me a note when he left that he was coming to America. He shared with me how he loved the theater. I think we can start with Broadway, Albert. But don’t talk to him before I do. I don’t want to scare him away. Maybe he started a new life here; I don’t want him to think he has to do anything…”

“I think he did enough…”

“Don’t judge him.”

“You’re making excuses for him.”

“Oh no! Believe me, when I see him; I’ll wring his neck but he’ll make his own decision. Thank you Albert. For everything.”

Three weeks had past before they found Terry. Actually, it was Terry who had found them. He had busted into the Andrew suite, yelling where he could find her, until he finally spotted her coming out of the water room where she had puked her last morning sickness she hoped. He had rushed to her, grabbed her into his arm and twirled her across the room.

“Stop Terry, stop I’m going to hurl again.”

He put her down and cradled her face with his hands.

“My God Freckles, you’re here!!”

Albert and George had come into the room wondering what the ruckus was all about; to find them starring in disbelief at each other. They both exited the room silently; pretty sure they weren’t even noticed anyway. It was endless minutes before either one could say anything. Terry took a step back.

“I heard from some guy in my theater troop that men had come to ask about a Terrence Grandchester, except I don’t go by that name here. Even my mom, who met those men, came to me. I don’t know why but even if it could have been my father looking for me, which I doubted, I knew it was you. Like I felt you near me. It has been that way for weeks and I didn’t know why.”

“We were waiting for you.”

“We? Is that Albert I just saw coming in?”

“Yes, it was Albert and yes he was also looking for you. But we knew we would find you,”

“Who’s that we you’re talking about ?”

“Me and him or her….”

Candy guided Terry’s hand to her belly. He stared at her not understanding.

“Me and the baby, you silly man…”

“What baby?”

Candy rolled her eyes…Got on her tiptoes and kissed him.

“Our baby…”

Part 5